MMSM: The Best or the Worst

Shannon is starting up her blog carnival again, Makes Me Smile Mondays. For the first month or so she's choosing a quote from a book, movie, or television show as the theme for everyone to write about. Read her post and then link up and join in the fun.



This week Shannon chose Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom,
it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of
incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was
the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us,
we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going
direct the other way . . .

I was all set to write about how raising children is the best and worst time of your life. And it is of course, but when I titled this post I decided to go a slightly different route.

Often your life and self-concept are based largely on perspective. Whether you are the best or the worst depends on who you compare yourself too.

Shannon wrote a post last week that garnered a lot of comments about motherhood and how good of a mom everyone thought they were. And of course everyone says they are the worst mom, because you can't brag and say you're the best mom - and it's a lot funnier to write or talk about all the things you do wrong instead of the things you do right. In my comment I said:

Sometimes I think commiserating with other moms about how terrible we are is not
the best thing, I could be actually doing something to be better rather than
bragging about how I suck. Other times I think I just need a break and I’m just
trying to be funny by talking about how crazy my life is. Othertimes I hear
about really bad family situations and am so grateful for my life and my small
problems. It’s all in how you look at it.

Aaron and I have talked a lot about this lately too. It's so easy to be unhappy with your situation when you compare yourself to people who have more, or are better than you in some way. I can be unhappy with my blog because I am not as funny as June, or as clever as Jane, or as popular as Ree. And I can be unhappy with my house because it isn't as big or fancy or clean as others. And I can be unhappy with my husband because he's not a saint like this guy I read about. But then I remember about all the people with no blogs, or no houses, or no husbands - or worse still, bad husbands. And I know I'm so much better off than all those people. I mean, come on - no blog! What could be worse?

Seriously though - when I think of it that way I remember how really lucky I am. I have a wonderful husband who loves me. He is a great father and supports us very comfortably. We have three beautiful boys who are healthy and happy. We have a house and two cars, and all the things that make life comfortable and good. And most importantly, we have a Heavenly Father who loves us and who has provided a plan for us to be happy. The Lord has given us prophets, scriptures, temples, and many other things to help and guide us.

I guess what it comes down to is not the comparison of ourselves to others, but the comparison of ourselves to what the Lord knows we can be. I shouldn't be unhappy because I am not as good as others, but neither should I be happy just because I am better than someone else. I only have to be the best I can - which unfortunately is a long way from where I am now. And I won't make progress by comparing myself to the best or the worst - just by pushing myself to improve. Even if it involves getting off the computer.

The Way His Mind Works

Alden is pretty funny sometimes. Some of the things he says make me think he might actually be listening sometimes. Take this scenario.
7:30am - Alden eats 1 bowl (kid-size) of cereal and declares himself done.
9:00am - Alden comes to me and complains about being hungry. I offer him some applesauce which he happily takes, getting himself a spoon.
9:15am - "Mommy, I ate my breakfast and had something healthy for lunch (the applesauce). Now can I have something with sugar in it?"

I love it when he asks me for something with sugar in it. I try to hide the smile though. This comes from all the times we talk to him about eating healthy food and although it's okay to have a treat sometimes, we don't want to eat too much sugar.

I interrupt this post to announce that Alden this instant (9:30am) came to me and said, "Mommy, I want something with sugar in it." I laughed out loud.

We usually try to give Alden healthier snacks in the mid-morning, you know, like 8am. He favors apples, bananas, cheese, yogurt, etc. Whenever he asks for a popsicle or cookie or the like, the things I indulge in all day long, I tell him maybe he can have some after lunch. Hence him thinking when he eats something semi-healthy at 9am, he can have sugar. I'm considering just feeding him a spoonful of sugar. To help the medicine go down.

Desperate Times

We are in serious trouble over here. I think our whole world changed yesterday.

Emmett can (and does) climb out of his crib.

My 22 and a half month old has done this a couple times in the last few weeks but not consistently. I've foolishly been putting him in his crib for time-outs occassionally and yesterday he came out like 10 times. He napped just fine though. And went to bed okay too. But around 9pm he wandered out with his trusty blanket and his empty water bottle. He often wants us to refill it once or twice a night. And I wonder why I have to wash his PJs and sheets almost everynight!

From 9 to 10:30 we put him back in bed five or 6 times. And then it was 5 times in 10 minutes. And then, until 1:30am I sat on the floor in front of his crib and pushed him back in everytime he tried to climb out. Hundreds of times! And he obviously cried a lot too. I would have just locked him in there and let him cry it out, but Alden is in there and Emmett attempted to get to him and wake him up several times. Good thing Alden was on the top bunk last night. And after missing four hours of sleep last night Emmett slept in... an entire hour! A tiny bit of help for me. Thank goodness Roland is catching on well to the sleep thing and I was only up once to feed him. And thank goodness Aaron didn't have to leave quite so early this morning.

So what do I do now? I have long relied on Dr. Weissbluth's book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. When I consulted it frantically at 10:30 last night, and then read again carefully this morning I found a few suggestions - one of which is doing pretty much what I did. I followed his rules of being non-engaging: no talking, no eye-contact, etc. He says it can take several nights but should be solved after that. I have the greatest respect for old Dr. Weissbluth but worry about his time tables. With Alden, the whole extinction sleep training thing was supposed to take 3-5 days - we stuck at it for 3 weeks before seeing results! But because it finally changed our lives completely with Alden, I've been a big believer. The other suggestion in the book is to get a crib tent to keep them in. Sounds great to me! The only drawback is the $70 pricetag. And when I read reviews some people complained about the quality - and only one company makes these for some reason. If it weren't for Alden in there, I'd just lock Emmett in - which I did try for naps this morning and found him asleep in front of the door.

So, thoughts? Comments? Inspirational words? Please share! I'm thinking about giving it one more try tonight to see how it goes - and then head for Babies R Us tomorrow if needed.

He is Risen!

Even though I am a couple days late - I need to post about our eventful Easter Sunday. But first I want to make a few comments. I love Easter and the chance to remind myself about the two most important events in the history of the world - the Atonement and the Resurrection. Jesus Christ made both of these possible because of His love for us. At church on Sunday, someone said that some Christian sects don't believe in the literal resurrection of the Savior, just that His spirit lives on forever or something. How sad. Just wanted to blog to the whole world that I know that Christ literally rose from the dead and that all men will be resurrected someday. But of course our resurrection would be pointless without the Atonement. I can't even explain how thankful I am for these blessings, but I don't think we mortals come anywhere near to understanding the scope anyway. Easter is a wonderful time to remind us of new beginnings and fresh starts. I feel like I'm at the beginning of my family life now - since my family is complete now. Love this shot of Baby Roland - fresh from his Heavenly Father.

Okay, on to the happenings of our Sunday. The Easter bunny made a stop at our house. Emmett had half his candy eaten before the rest of us woke up. The Johnsons stood us up for breakfast but we headed over to my parents early for a few family photos.

Sacrament meeting was nice, what I could catch of it anyway. The musical numbers were beautiful. In primary, Alden gave his first talk! He's all of three and a half now, so I guess they thought he was ready to have his mom feed him a talk line by line. He did great and everyone seemed to love him. We all tried to relax a bit in the afternoon. Then Shannon cleaned up my whole house while I made dinner. We managed to stuff everyone back into their Sunday clothes in time for our guests at 6. We blessed Baby Roland! It went very well - the rest of the pictures are from the blessing. Roley is the third blessing we've had at home. Aaron thinks it should be a family affair and I say, hey - if we have refreshments then okay by me.

Then, we all cried as the Johnsons packed up and headed back up north. Here's Alden attempting to stow away in the mini-van. He sure misses those girls! These last shots are after everyone from the blessing had left. Finally Roley had something to smile about.

Trip O Fun, Days 2 & 3

Friday we started out with a lovely french toast breakfast, thanks to Shannon & Tom. Okay, it was a second breakfast for my boys & I. Can I help it if they wake up at seven and expect to be fed right away? Shannon & I (& the three youngest) shopped for new Easter outfits while our husbands tried to take the three oldest to a spring training baseball game, which was unfortunately sold out. Instead, the kids spent all afternoon outside playing in our wading pool & the sprinklers - basically turning the backyard into a mud hole. But us adults were able to stay inside where it was relatively quiet and gorge ourselves on delicious guacamole and Shannon's homemade oreo cookies. We met up with our friends, the Jensens, at the park to play - then headed back to our house for pizza and dessert. The kids again trashed the backyard, this time with pizza crusts and smashed citrus from our trees. But hey, they stayed out of our hair.

Saturday morning we went to an Easter Egg Hunt, sponsored by my parent's ward. I'm so glad the kids had fun and that we all made it to this because it saved us from feeling obligated to color eggs and do the whole hunt thing ourselves. We all went out to IHOP afterwards, which was quite the experience with six kids. They we didn't even all sit together, just in two adjacent booths. Not bad for Shannon & I, who got the better end of the deal, kidwise. We wiled all afternoon away with naps, college basketball on tv, and blogging. Check out Shannon's new look at What About Mom? The adults enjoyed a surf & turf dinner, thanks to Omaha Steaks and Aaron's Christmas bonus. Tom & Aaron went to an ASU baseball game while Shannon & I stayed up with the girls and watched Enchanted. It was like old times - just hanging out all day and cooking together before watching a movie. Man we miss the Johnsons! Thanks for coming to visit us.

Johnson/Carpenter Trip of Fun! Day 1

After party-ing into the wee hours with Shannon (and Tom) after they arrived Wednesday night, or at least until 10:30, we all had to sleep in a bit Thursday morning. But before long we found ourselves at the Phoenix Zoo - along with four or five thousand other spring-breakers. We still had fun just being together, despite the heat and crowds. The animals were nice too. While we were in Florida Alden drove Avery nuts and she had little patience for him, now they seem to be the best of friends, even to the exclusion of poor Callie. But she didn't seem to feel too bad. After all, Emmett's friendship was up for grabs. Even Candice and Jaycee were able to come and get to know our friends too.


After a bit of a rest and some naps for the kiddos we stopped for dinner at Mangos in downtown Mesa before heading to the temple for the Easter Pagaent. A meal with six kids is kind of hard but we made it through. The kids ran around and looked at the statues while the adults finished eating. A big thanks to my mom for letting us leave Emmett and Lucy at her house after dinner. The rest of us enjoyed the pagaent- or at least tried. The kids were a bit tired and grumpy - okay, mostly Alden. And me. But so worth it.

Makutu's Island

Tuesday of Spring Break my mom took Tami & I and all seven grandkids to Makutu's Island. It's one of those kinds of places that you feel like anyone could make off with one of your kids any second and you wouldn't even notice. You know, the kind they always have on tv where the bad guy snatches some cute little girl or boy. But... they seemed to have good security there, with printed wristbands and limited in and out access. And hey, we did have three adults for the seven kids - so we saw them each every ten minutes or so.

There is a whole rainforest/jungle theme and miles of tunnels and slides and fun stuff for kids of every age. Our kids all loved it and we didn't lose anyone and the whole trip was a rousing success. Thanks for taking us Mom!

St. Patrick's Day Fun

We had a great time at a St. Patrick's Day feast over at Will & Missy's house last night. Our thanks to them for inviting us and providing such delicious food. We had corned beef and all the fixings, my only contributions were green jello and a green lemon cake. Missy even made 2 kinds of delicious Irish Soda bread, my favorite was a recipe listed here. I wanted a picture of my whole family, all decked out it green. We only have like 1 shot of all 5 of us since the baby was born. But we forgot and I barely remembered in time for Aaron to snap one of me and the boys before we broke out the PJs. Hope everyone else had a great green day too!

More Zoo Fun

We are still lovin' our season pass to the Phoenix Zoo. Saturday was Roland's first trip, and he managed to sleep through the entire thing. We did the children's zoo portion, which Aaron had never seen, and visited the wallabies, lots of birds, some monkeys (besides ours), and the Farm playground. There were lots of really cool statues that graciously agreed to pose with us. Alden still has that weird smile going on and although he was great about wearing his hat and sunglasses the whole time (to protect him), I'm not sure why the hat sat so low on his head.

WWFW - Pirate Party

Ahoy, Matey! Here's a great idea for all of you with little boys out there. Alden goes to a little co-op preschool for 2 hours a week. The moms all trade off hosting and every week we do a letter of the alphabet. Today was the letter X and I really wondered what my friend, Jody, would do. But she is brilliant and came up with a whole Pirate theme, with X Marks the Spot! She said I could share the ideas with everyone - they would be perfect for preschool, a birthday party, or just a fun activity for your little pirate.

The treasure hunt is the big activity - Jody printed them out on cardstock and let the boys crinkle them up. She even sent me the Publisher file, if anyone wants it. They went around the house according to the map and collected Xs. And at the end they found the treasure! Alden loved his chocolate coins and preferred to eat them whole and spit out the foil afterwards.

For snacks they had beef jerky and dried fruit and goldfish crackers.

There were also cute flags they constucted by glueing 2 bones in an X and stapling to a drinking straw.

For a little quieter activity they read some pirate books:

How I Became a Pirate - Melinda Long & David Shannon
Pirate Pete's Giant Adventure - Kim Kennedy
Do Pirates Take Baths? - Kathy Tucker

This is what worked for me and Alden today - for more great ideas check out Works for Me Wednesday, hosted by Shannon at Rocks in My Dryer.

First Smiles

Roland smiled at me for the first time on Wed. March 5th! I even had witnesses. Jo & Forrest Humble stopped by to visit and bring a cute gift for Roley - they saw the whole thing. I love little fake baby smiles, while they are sleeping or passing gas, but this was a real smile just for Mom. He gave me a few more last night and graced Aaron with his first Daddy smile this morning. This was the closest picture I could get. Isn't that a cute blanket? My Mom made it for Roland - the first blanket just for him rather than a hand-me-down. She crocheted all the cute trim. Thanks Mom!

Pancake Mix

I generally list pancakes as my favorite food - love the ones from IHOP and Martha Stewart's Best Buttermilk Pancakes recipe. I usually make Bisquick pancakes for our family but recently found a great recipe for a make-your-own mix, which saves a lot of money and tastes better too. This recipe comes via my friend Jane (What About Mom) who got it from her sister Marcy (Marcy & Adam) who apparently got it from the Mom's Make-a-Mix Cookbook (couldn't find this on Amazon - maybe title is different). I used half whole wheat flour just to be healthier - it makes for a heartier texture too.

Pancake Mix (from Mom’s Make-a-Mix Cookbook)

10 cups flour (you can do any combination of white and wheat flour; you can even add wheat germ or other healthy stuff)

2 1/2 cups instant nonfat dry milk (if you don’t have powdered milk, you can just always make it up with milk and buttermilk with no problems.)

2/3 cup sugar

1/4 cup baking powder

2 TB salt

Mix well & store in airtight container.

To make 12 3-inch pancakes:

1 1/2 cups Pancake Mix

1 egg, slightly beaten

1/4 cup buttermilk

3/4-1 cup milk or water

3 TB oil

Cook pancakes on high heat griddle. (I don’t know why pancake recipes call for high heat. I like to use just barely over medium.)

For more money-saving recipes check out The Recipe Box Swap at i have to say.

Weekend O Fun

Friday night Aaron took me out to a little Thai restaurant. It is a little gem we discovered four or five years ago and then I guess we forgot about it the last few years. It's called Benjarong Thai and for you Mesa dwellers, it's on Country Club and Southern. We had a coconut chicken Thai soup (Aaron's fave) and a curry (my fave) and split a dessert. With our 2 for 1 entree coupon the bill came out around $15. My favorite Thai dessert is magoes with sticky rice but since mangoes aren't quite in season yet we got the Thai custard with sticky rice. I mostly love the sweet rice anyway, but the custard was sooo good! I need to find a recipe. It had a very different texture - not as smooth, but not lumpy either. It kind of seemed layered, although I don't think it is. I do have a good recipe for the mangoes and sticky rice - I will post it soon.

Saturday morning we went to the Arizona Museum for Youth. We signed up with Generation Eight, an ASU sponsored program, to attend a special exhibit, (for free!) Jim Henson's Fantastic World. The museum has three areas - a kid's play area that is always there and two rotating exhibit spaces. Alden & Emmett loved the play area - they had tons of cool stuff, some pretty ingenious I thought. Then there was the Berenstain Bears exhibit, which was lots of fun too and had plenty of interactive opportunities for the kids. Not to mention the free refreshments. Last was the Jim Henson exhibit. This was not as interesting for children, since they don't remember The Muppet Show, Fraggle Rock, etc. and the displays were much more geared towards adults. But Aaron, Candice, and I enjoyed it a lot.

Don't ask me what's up with Alden's smile. This is his camera smile.

Saturday was also Aaron's Mom's birthday. Happy Birthday, CJ! We had a little party at the park, had a great time, and ate very well too. The boys love their Nana and she is always taking one or the other of them to give me a break. Candice & I took CJ to lunch last Thursday for her birthday and enjoyed some nice adult time.

Late Christmas

Somehow we haven't seen my Aunt Beverly since before Christmas but she stopped by on Friday to visit. She brought darling little ornaments for our family - intricately ribbon-woven birds with long tails. And she brought gifts for the boys. Turns out they haven't forgotten how to tear into a wrapped present. Thanks, Aunt Beverly, for the ball, dinosaur, cards, and Play-doh. And the best part for me was when she stayed and played with Alden & Emmett for three hours! Here is a shot of them modeling animals out of the Play-doh.